Liz, you make a really good point, and I think that's why I am feeling so frustrated by a resurgence of the craving to drink. It has been awhile (at least a couple of months) since I had feelings craving this strong, and I was starting to feel, yes, like I was free and strong. It's a hard realization to know that there could always be a sleeping monster (my AV) in the back of my brain and that I am going to have to be strong enough and smart enough to know that it is full of sh** and looking for ways to worm its way back into my life.