This has got me thinking. Mostly it is people I hardly know that do this to me, my friends are just normal humans who can be a pain sometimes, just like me but not habitually. One friend is annoying because she rarely opens up but is a great listener, sometimes it leaves me feeling like I've taken more than I've given - she's okay with it though, she says she knows she can talk if she wants.
But I think it may have had something to do with D first talking to me and becoming friends years ago. Now he's often with me and sees it happen to me - even the local pizza shop folk talk to me about personal stuff and I have sort of said to him it mystifies me. He said he first talked to me because I looked at him as if he was a person.
Looking at those I've picked out as friends none of them have been people who began by 'opening up' to me. Even D first helped me with my homework - it was ages into our friendship that he told me any hard stuff and only one of my others friends has ever really had any major problems.
Some people I've met have been good friends to me but have also opened up - but not in a grabby or needy way, just honestly.
Because it happens to me quite a lot with people I've hardly met and I have warmed to them, even liked them, but I've rarely if ever sought out their friendship longterm. In a sense I think I've backed away. With just one exception D but then oddly considering the cr*p I know he's been through he hardly ever talks about it - when he does it isn't emotive and he expects it to have no effect, like he expects me to have forgotten the day after. His Mum and brother actually told me more about what happened than he ever has. I've always felt like this frustrates me but now I'm wondering if a part of me is afraid.
The kids I work with have said (working as a group and all of them agreed) that no-one loved or wanted them because it was too hard.