Hello and a warm welcome to you. My heart hurts for all you are going through. Your fear comes right through.
Stop talking to this man, immediately. In no recovery program will they find the tools being to do it alone and go F everyone else. That's just nuts and shows how full of it he is.
Protect yourself. I also recommend you be honest with your family. I am sure they don't want you to suffer with this either.
God Bless to you!