Thanks everybody. I still not feel anything, but I sure I gonna hork up brick in my chest at some point. Maggie was alcoholic who sober for 30 year. I lie to her last time I see her. Tell her I sober and she not has to worry about me anymore. Now I gotta make good.
bimi, I sorry my description of using at rock bottom levels again was seductive to you. It funny how dark tale of harrowing descent into wasted days of alcoholic madness ...actually sound pretty good to alcoholics! Oh my. Jesus God. We one hella f*cked up crew. Thank gods we has each other.
Anyways, is not gonna be any drunken grieving. Nonsense has to stop.
As Captain Picard say, when he finally had it with relentless Borg and they destructive nonsense: "The line must be drawn here! Here! This far! No farther!"