I had 54 sober days in a row...had one drink...lead to many. which led to being sent home from work for being intoxicated.
Thought wow that escalated quickly...so I'll stop again. went back to AA. Got 30 straight sober days..didnt learn from before...thought let's TRY drinking again.
2 day mini binge...led me to hospital. blacked out on subway platform. Luckily didn't harm myself or anyone else.
I'm 19 days sober now my alcoholism doesn't stop if I don't drink for a period of time.
I've learned the hard way.
I'm scared of drinking as well.
Glad you're here. Welcome to SR.