Welcome Stewy, this sounds like a great decision. Once you get all that alcohol out of your system I dare say you will start to feel better and a lot of those morbid thoughts will start to lift. Why not give it a go today? I know it is scary, and yes, easier said than done (I'm living proof of that!) but it is a simple as not picking up the first drink. Instead of drinking tonight you could pour all your lager out. Sort of a symbolic goodbye. We'll be here to support you through it. You could check in here instead of googling upsetting stuff.
In any case, we'll also be here if you decide not to do that and want to join us tomorrow. The decision is yours, the sooner you do it, the sooner you are on your way to feeling better. Best of luck, happy to have you here.