Thank you, all. I'm still feeling a bit puny.
I get the DS taking me for granted part, or at least I understand it. I completely recognize that I take my parents for granted sometimes... and that I'm lucky that I can.
IDK. I guess, I'm just wondering if he remembers what it was like to live with his dad, or if he's forgotten it. He was so little. If he has forgotten, is that a good thing? (and honestly a bit of future-tripping is involved for me, too: If he doesn't remember, is he going to be mad at me for his dad not coming around.) All questions that no one else can answer and I'm hesitating to bring up the topic of his dad's alcoholism again right now. Not very happy birthday-ish.
It helps a lot to be able to just throw it out there with people who get why I'm off balance. (And LoveMeNow, yep.
He's adorable and smart and kind and completely goofy sometimes. Which is lovely to see because he was so very quiet when we lived with his dad and was still a bit reserved until the past few years.)
Thanks, again. ((((hugs))))