only a matter of time(step 1)
Before I drink or drug again. That's what the first step of AA means to me - that there is NO situation that will be painful enough to keep me from picking up the first one. And that as a true addict/alcoholic I will use EVERY time no matter what. And once I start, I can't stop, and if I do stop, I can't STAY stopped for any considerable length of time through my own will power.
Today is day 7 and I am in the danger zone. I'm feeling better, healthier, less depressed. This is the part where I use. And I noticed today and yesterday that I'm starting to get those "pleasurable memories" of drinking and using again, so I need to get busy NOW whether I feel like it or not.
I'm going over the first step with my sponsor tonight before my home group then starting the second step. I know not everyone here does AA and it's not for everyone but I'm convinced if I don't do these steps I will having a needle hanging out of my arm soon.
Hope everyone is doing well.