Thanks allfor, for the extra prayers. Right now, this early time when the urges are still so strong, is hard. Ah is struggling but determined.
Wonderful that your husband got treatment before your son had to see most of it! We have two kids, a daughter who's 15 and a son that's 2. Our dd has seen far too much but has great childhood memories since the worst of it has been the past three years. Our son is hopefully too young still and will grow up knowing a sober daddy.
I can feel myself taking some of my power back. It's a quiet, determined kind of power. As hard as all of this is, I have grown and matured so much. Sometimes wish it didn't have to be this way, but like Blue said, take it, and grow and learn from it. I gave him all my power and then got upset when he abused it. So now I'm learning that I hold a lot of power and I need to manage it for the positive.
I'm just beginning to learn and sometimes it's very overwhelming. The only thing I know right now is I've come too far to turn around or give up. When you're going through hell, keep going, right? I do hold the key, just need to figure out how to put it in the lock.