I finally went to my first meeting ever
Yesterday I called in sick to work and told myself I had to do something, make some step in the right direction. This past week has been horrid, and I've gone around in circles trying to decide what to do. I considered everything from meetings to rehab to suicide. Yesterday I had to make a decision, so I decided to start at the obvious place, the simplest and the one I've resisted for years. Go to a meeting. So I found a LifeRing meeting and went to it, terrified, shaking from fear and withdrawal. And you know what? It was really good. It was 10 people, all very different, but all really kind and supportive. I don't fully understand how this will play into my recovery and how to use it effectively, but I'm sure that will become clear if I stick with it, which I intend to do. It was a good step, and I'm proud of my stubborn self.