I was full blown alcoholic by the time I was 19 years old. Drinking by myself frequently.
I wasn't ready to quit either.
I am now 27 years old and finally ready to quit. The last 8 years have been a sad, steady decline into further emotional turmoil and mental distress.
I hope you get the gift of desperation sooner than later.
I can assure you, this is a great place to start.