I don't feel "hyper-vigilant" or even vigilant. It is not that hard to not do something. I have long lists of things I haven't done -- I call them, "to-do lists".
I don't know why you would avoid food made with wine in the cooking process. Substantially all (yes I know there are traces left) of the alcohol has cooked out. You can't get drunk off coq au vin or chicken marsala.