Looking into the life of an addict
Well, I just posted a little on another thread about one of my day labor jobs I had for 2 days this week. It was cleaning and emptying the house for a landlord of an addicted tenant that has completely disappeared off the face of the earth.
The house was trashed, it smelled of alcohol. I am supposing spilled alcohol stained every room. The walls were yellow and smelled of cigarettes. Needles everywhere. Dead mouses, and rats, and rat and mouse poop were everywhere.
Here we were, my cohort and I throwing away this ladies entire life. Everything all her pictures, most of her belonging as it was all a health hazard. Pictures of her family, pictures of when she wasn't and addict, it was so sad. Such an event. We found drugs stashed in a few places in the house and over 100 bottles of alcohol.
I couldn't help imagining this person strung out and homeless. Or worse murdered and in the gutter, and here I am tossing her life away. I wanted to cry. I could see myself in her, I could see my future life if I continue in addiction.
In a weird way, I wish I could talk to this person and tell them about my issues. I wish I could offer some help or an ear, I wish I could lean on them and they could lean on me. I learned so much about this ladies life just by looking at her stuff and seeing everything. I felt like she was the friend I never had.
Most of all, I wish I could tell her how much i care for her, and I didn't even know her. I got a glimpse into my future if I continue in addiction, it was like looking into the mirror and a crystal ball of the future that awaits me if I don't get and stay sober.
Such a sad reality, but what I needed to see honestly. I needed to know what addiction can really do to a person. Its like I was meant to see this, and now I am left with a choice. Get better, or possibly one day somebody will be throwing my life away and pictures of my family and I will be nowhere to be found. That my friends, is a reality I wish on nobody!
Good day, sorry for such a sad post, but it really moved me and I thought I would talk about.