Anvil always hits the... well, I lined myself up for quite the word play there. Too bad I couldn't tie Hammer in there somewhere. ANYWAY, what Anvil said is spot on. When you remove yourself from the situation and look at it from outside, what other grown adult do you treat this way? Do you treat your boss like this? Your postman? Your doctor? Chances are probably good that's a big fat no. So why do you treat your A this way? He's not a naughty preschooler who needs redirection and a bit of coddling. If he wants help, he'll seek it. If he wants people to genuinely care about him, then he'll become someone worthy of that affection. You don't need to be concerned with anyone other than yourself, because you need and deserve the affection that only you can give.