ESD907. That's not me in the photo. But close to it anyways...if you were to ask someone. And don't be envious...you wouldn't want my problems.
Hm...why do I think drinking is 'normal'? Because 98% of people I know drink. Are all of them 'normal' drinkers....maybe not? But....when you come down to it....a lot of people drink. I know more drinkers then non drinkers...and that isn't because of who I hung around with because I didn't hang around with anyone.
Hmm...how can I put him through this? I wish I knew...how could I put myself threw this? We are taught in early sobriety to put me, myself and I first...aren't we?? So why would I stop now? I am being selfish now...100%...but I wish he understood that I wasn't doing this to hurt him in any way....I am only hurting myself.
Why did I drink? Because it felt good. I was going through BS anxiety and OCD that is only getting worse...and of course anxiety only gets worse with drinking, but man, does it feel good not to overthink things for a while - and it helped the OCD. I guess I became complacent. I really did. Sadly....if i changed my game up, maybe I wouldn't be here...but I am..
And I really wish that I wasn't.