I know jarp it resonated with me. My ah has told me many times he's in love with me and wants his future to bewith me. I have said this many times to him for him to hold onto and a reason to fight. I have also told him I love him and want him home but not while he's drinking!!
What I thought and hoped was good intentions and for the right reasons may not have been and just me trying to manipulate him.
I will also be talking to my counsellor about this!! More to think about, no wonder recovery is emotionally exhausting!!