Hi Butterfly,
What's "intermittent chicken"? I'm curious now
I am feeling a lot of similar feelings about my separated AH. Last night,
I had a dream about the first guy I ever had a huge crush on. He was my best friend's older brother, and he only saw me as a little sister. Anyway, I dreamed about him last night. When I woke up, I thought to myself "This is NOT all there is. Waiting to be loved by a husband who CAN'T return my love and maybe never will."
He has a way of giving me little rays of hope that he is truly trying to change. A couple of weeks ago he said he felt bad about not being there for me more during our marriage and said "my head just wasn't right. I'm sorry." He says things like that, or makes little comments about how he's not interested in meeting anyone else. He does that to keep me from moving on. I am in no position to date anyone right now, nor do I want to. I have a lot of work to do and I need to focus on my boys. But I'm not doing myself any good remaining emotionally tied to someone who hasn't made a single step toward change in the six months we've been separated.