this is a good place to come for support and growth. you will learn a lot here, if you spend the time and pay attention.
in the stories and experiences of others, you will see pieces of your own story. Some of it you may have already acknowledged. Other stuff, maybe you'll only recognize in yourself after seeing it someone else.
It takes time and effort for us to learn to see what's really going on with our addiction. And then it takes time and effort and real action to break the cycle and build new patterns of living.
but, it does work and it does get better and you will one day (if you continue to work at it) find yourself amazed at how wonderful life is and even sometimes utterly perplexed at the person you once were with alcohol as a haze over everything.
welcome.