Day 1 without a drink
Hi. I've been lurking for about a month - right after my RAH went into rehab. So yes I'm a double winner.
I haven't been drinking as much since he's been away but I've still been drinking almost every day and have been hating myself for it. This morning I woke up fuzzy headed, dumped the remains of my big bottle of wine and haven't had a drink today. He is coming home on Friday and I've been extremely anxious about it. I went to an Al-anon meeting last Friday and saw a new therapist on Wednesday - I have another therapy appointment this week and will be going back to the same meeting on Friday (I really liked the group).
I also know from reading here that I'm an enabler and am codependent. I have a lot to work on but I'm looking forward to finding the person I used to be and enjoying life more. I know I have to focus on my own recovery and give him room to do the same. He sounds really great and very focused. Sometimes he has a tendency to run me over though when he gets zealous on things. Or maybe I should say the I "let" him run me over or I just jump on his train.
I'll be back tomorrow!