Originally Posted by
soverylost 
Very bad night. He wanted to be left alone. After four hours i talked to him. Wrong decision. He wasn't even drinking. He completely lost it. Our daughter phoned her cousin, and my bil then lost it on ah. Now ah is saying the family is done. He left for a hotel.
Our family is ruined and it's all my fault. My fault because he wanted to be left alone and I didn't. I talked to him. Why couldn't i have just shut up like he wanted? He wasn't even drinking!! He's been sober for three nights now and this is how I thank him?
My family is ruined. I'm lost.
Why do you have to thank him for being sober three nights? For most people that would be considered a bare minimum of responsible adult behavior.
I lived in craziness for a long time to, and my "norm" got turned upside down as well. It is hard when everything in the household revolves around someone who is a cyclone of destruction.
What do you want? What would make you happy?