I have a friend that I met in AA. We have coffee one night a week after a meeting. She's been sober for 20-30 years. Well she plays it like we get together because she's being supportive and helping me. However, when we get together it's her mouth running from the minute we sit down until she notices I'm not paying attention anymore or I get "the look" like I"m sick of listening to her. Then she's like, oh how was work? Don't get me wrong. I get to talk sometimes, but not too much.
The thing of the "talking" that I'm fed up with is she's a broken record. Her daughter is mean to her and the lady who is in charge of the after school program where she works is mean to her, the girl scout cookie ladies are mean to her... it goes on and on and her neighbor problems. It's not just when we meet, this is what she talks about at every meeting too! So I get it double. I tell her, yes I know or well why do you keep doing this or that.
I feel like her counselor or psychologist. One day we were going to go to the art museum together. I got in her car and she started up about her daughter. Not, hi, how are you? Just bla bla bla! I told her I can't listen to it today. Please!
In the past I've actually had a couple of drinks before I met her to take the edge off. Of course it didn't work, but I did.
I don't want to see her anymore. I would probably see her at meetings but I want to gently tell her without hurting her feelings that I just don't want to meet for coffee anymore or I need to take a break or something. One night I just didn't show up and didn't answer my phone, but that's not nice and I felt bad when I lied and said I fell asleep.
If you have suggestions, comments, I'd love to hear them. Otherwise, just consider this a vent.