Jeni,
You ARE a different person! You know I'm sorry for your loss. The person you have become is now someone who had the capacity to heal with your father. And in the end, he gained the capacity to heal with you. That's huge.
When I met you, you were a wonderful person with so much to give, such a sensitivity to others. Like so many of us, you had a lot of anxieties about life. Now you are just a complete wonder. A rock star!