yeAh, you are right. I was being pretty negative, but that was the place I was in....Negative City.
I went into the hospital again for three days and got out sunday. i'm in day treatment again now. i'm feeling ok at the moment, but yesterday and thursday were bad days.
i'm at my sisters (the only way my doc would let me out of the hospital) now and her computer is hard to type on.
i'm feeling more alone than ever though. my life seems pointless and a burdon to others. I'm still having suciadal thoughts, but i'm not voicing those thoughts again right now, because that's what got me put in the hospital. my doc is making me angry. I told him how tired I was and he told me to quit smoking and lose weight b/c that's why i'm tired. bull sh*t!!!!!!!!!!!! it's called A MAJOR DEPRESSIVE EPISODe!!!!!!!!!!!!!
They are also telling me to find a new job, take back control over my finances and move to a bigger town! now this would be all fine and dandy if I wasn't going through a MAJOR DEPESSIVE EPISODE!!!!!!!!