Welcome to SR! Reading the posts here helped me understand that I'm not alone, and that the loved ones of alcoholics feel isolated, like we're the only ones--but we are sharing a common experience.
Al anon was a really great place for me. I grew up in an alcoholic/addicted home and so, when I met my ex, his behavior was right in my blind spot. I couldn't see his dysfunction, because dysfunction was my normal.
Al anon helped me understand alcoholism, how to be a healthy person in the midst of other people's problems, and how to recognize my own needs (this is all very much a work in progress!!!)
Alcoholics are rarely the evil gutter dwellers we imagine. Most are very normal for most of their lives. Unfortunately, if they don't seek help, it continues to get worse. A lot worse. I wish you and your BF a future of sobriety and health, wherever life leads you!