((Venus))
I am certainly not going to tell you that it is "stupid decision" - it's hard, tough, heart-breaking and life-changing decision to make.
Please, push dark thoughts away.
I hope doctors will make their best jobs and you will get well as soon as possible.
Please, never stop fighting for yourself - for every sunrise to see, for every day to see a beautiful ocean, and to post on SR.
Lots of love to you!
Thinking of you.