Originally Posted by
Mrrryah1 
I totally agree Jupe.
Even if I'm feeling negative emotions, like sad, angry, lonely, whatever it may be, at least I'm actually feeling. At least that's REAL.
I like "there's a light at the end of the tunnel. But it's a sewage tunnel and you have to wade through alot of **** to get there."
I'm a firm believer that all of those feelings I "drank away" didn't just disappear, never to resurface again. I'm gonna have to wade through all of that stuff, those old, numbed emotions, to get to that light & to start feeling better.
I call this stage of my recovery "emotional defrosting", lol.
I think you answered both of your questions yourself.
a.) Yes, you've now lost your very good friend who kept you from feeling lonely. It can actually be akin to grieving the loss of a loved one.
b.) Many, many alcoholics self-medicate an undiagnosed psychological problem without realizing it. It's only after removing the "medication" that addressing the possible underlying condition can begin. That's when accessing help from a medical professional, counselor or therapist should be part of your recovery.
Also, the onset of post-acute withdrawal symptoms (similar to what you're describing) is quite common and, in my experience, is a frequent cause of relapse regardless of the substance that was recently discontinued. The more you reach out for support and assistance during this period, the better your odds of maintaining the sobriety you've achieved so far.
Congrats on your progress. You sound very committed and thoughtful about what needs to be done.