((Jennie))
Families and relationships are complex, and often times the pressure put on a person to hold it all together will make you retreat. I hope you find some answers soon. I too would likely just show up, but that's just my personality LOL.
It's ok to give up trying for a little bit and give your mind rest. However, when you are ready, try again. It may be something you are completely not even thinking of. Age does strange things to the mind sometimes.
Keep getting your feelings out. While it is tiring, it is also healing to your soul.
Hugs XXX