I am here for support. I do have support at home but I would like to be in a place that the people who here understand a little better than those who haven't been in the same position. I was sober for about 5 months. I decided I was going to test myself with control. I couldn't stand not being able to have a beer with my friends and what not. So I had a couple beers one day. That went just fine. Beer was not an issue. That made me happy. However, liquor was a problem. I bought a pint of whiskey, I drank the entire pint in one night, blacking out. Just as I had before I was sober. I was upset with myself but I wanted to try again. I waited a few days bought a fifth of whiskey and drank 2/3 of it in one night again blacking out. Long story short.. I kept trying and failing. I started drinking more and more and more actually found myself waking up at 330am this morning (after blacking out) and finished the rest of my whiskey. I then went back to sleep and woke up in tears. I am putting an end to it now. I went through insomnia, anxiety, mood swings, hallucinating (prob. from no sleep) the last time but I got through it with help from my closest friends. Now maybe with the help of some good people here this time around
