Whew. I haven't been able to stop thinking about this since I saw that article. Who knows what happened but it is certainly chilling to think about. I know I used to be attracted to passionate, angst filled, crazy men who added a lot of excitement and drama in my life. It was a roller coaster and gave me something to think about always, something to get my adrenaline going. I used to think that the extreme emotional engagement meant it was love. However... I did eventually get tired. It is exhausting living like that with emotions flying around all over the place. Can also be very damaging and I no longer think that is love. Love should be supportive and feel nice. The guy I have now is rather boring in comparison. Rather boring in general actually. But he loves me completely and gives me a stable home base. From there I can get my kicks in other ways that leave me feeling better about myself, not worse. For instance, a surf lesson, fire poi, a dance class, a new challenging job or volunteer position. You may want to try bungee jumping or learning to fly an airplane since it seems you have a high fear tolerance (LOL). I am glad you are getting some help in therapy. I have a feeling you'll be ok once you get back in touch with your instincts and sense of self worth. I am rooting for you!