Hi Spia,
There's no need to give up hope. Take a closer look around this forum and you will see that some of the most respected voices here are recovering alcoholics. I'm very grateful that they participate so actively because it reminds me not to judge people so harshly.
That said, Spia, you are future tripping. I totally understand wanting to feel some reassurance about the future... To know that our efforts are not wasted. It would make decision-making so much easier! Here's the thing... Hope for the future is important. It's critical! But, hope is not a plan. I learned that, in hoping for my AH to take charge and get sober, I was relinquishing my duty to take charge of my own life. I was placing full responsibility for our lives on his shoulders, and I don't think that's fair now.
Ultimately, we didn't stay together, but it wasn't because I lost hope for him. My story is not the success story you are looking for. But, I do view it as a success. I have learned so much more about myself and I'm now taking pride in the direction I'm taking in life. Sometimes, both people find they want the same things in life... Sometimes not. But, the important thing is figuring out what you want. Other things will become clearer after that.
Wishing you peace,
Fathom