I'm sorry you're struggling OpioPhobe but I'm really glad you came back. I for one would have wondered what happened to you.
lol I've heard alcoholics talk of needle addicts as the end of the line/the bottom rung too...truth is (IMO) we're all in this together...
Addiction will get you anyway it can...if your familiar Option A is unavailable it'll happily scurry on over to Option B C... or Z....and it'll wait for option A to come round too.
I'm glad you're back and posting. You're a long way from being beaten yet OP.
I think NA is a good idea too
you can do this - we got your back
D