Just checked, no meetings offering child care. I don't have a sitter other than the daycare, and that's during my work hours. I haven't told anyone about this, I've stopped keeping up with friends years ago. I don't have enough energy for work, kids, marriage and friends.
If my family ever found out...my mom would never recover. Yes she is an adult, but since my dad died she's gone really downhill, she had a mental breakdown when my brother and my sister didn't baptise their kids. With my sister,that was nine years ago and she still can't get past it. I'd be the one who truly broke her heart.
I'm really just babbling here, i apologize.. My next therapy session isn't until Sept 11 and it's a new therapist,i don't know how it will go. The old one had no advice except that I had a moral obligation to save my husband, that i promised on front of God in sickness and in health . That isn't working so well.