Originally Posted by
sadathome 
He has never been violent. Afraid to leave because of 37 years of marriage and love is blind. I do not like his drunk side but his sober side is loving. I pray every day for cure but it just doesn't seem to be enough. My husband always says"thru sickness and health" from our wedding vows which I truly believe in but my body is tried of the "sickness"
Thanks for your concerns. I do appreciate them!
If you do not wish to leave, you will have to work on accepting him the way he is. Obviously I understand your desire for him to quit drinking, but the reality is..he is in complete control of that decision. Your choices..what is in your control..is only staying..and leaving. Al-anon will provide you with the support YOU need in dealing with whatever decision you come to.
If you decide to stay, you need to accept you are living with something you cannot control. Do your best to shield yourself from his behaviour when he is drinking. Do not engage with him when he is drinking. Don't get him to bed. Don't call in sick for him to his employers. Leave him be.
It will do you a world of good to find others in a similar position to you.