TinyOwl, congratulations on your choice of sobriety and your courage, it takes real courage to look into that gaping maw of fear and uncertainty and step forward.
The AV is about drinking, all about drinking, and only about drinking. It includes thoughts of self doubt and uncertainty concerning your ability to choose permanent and unconditional sobriety. With this definition in mind, it should be clear that the thoughts of only temporary sobriety are nothing more than that whiny needy thoughtless drive to get more alcohol. Those are simply AV.
You don't have to think about not drinking tomorrow, just make that vow to NEVER NOW DRINK. We don't have to anguish over the past and its depression, or fret over the future and its anxiety, just be present now, in the now. This is the only moment we surely own in its entirety. You can always choose to not drink for a second, for a moment. Make that moment the present moment.
You also need not replace thoughts of drinking with anything else. Just accept them without judgement, in true
mindfulness fashion. Awareness of thoughts, like the AV and its drinking thoughts and thoughts of self-doubt, and their acceptance without judgement, allow that rational part of us to see things clearly. Awareness allows us to choose sobriety every single time. For good.
Once I understood the power of this tool I now held in my hand, I understood that I need never fear the thoughts of drinking again. I became confident that these thoughts would never overwhelm me again, and in that confidence, I fulfilled my plan of ever drinking again. It became something I could promise myself, a gift to myself of a fresh new start. I made a vow to never drink again, and to never change my mind.
Once I understood this tool of awareness and mindfulness and what it meant to my life, the relief of this profound knowing that my addiction was over for good filled me with a feeling of relief and joy I hadn't experienced for many years. I was going to allow myself to become the person I knew I could be. I was free.
TinyOwl, I hope you keep posting about your journey. You are most welcome here. Onward!