Originally Posted by
amy55 
Shooting Star, you put it so well. I remember reading and reading, and researching all things, but none of it was to make me better, it was all to accept him as he was. I couldn't.
Reading this is like reading about my life. A big trigger. I thought I was helping myself, but I wasn't. It was all about him. I needed to start making it about me and the life that I wanted to have, and not walk on eggshells anymore.
So yes, self-help books hurt me, alanon would have hurt me, therapists hurt me, why? Simply because I wasn't thinking about me, I was still trying to fix him, or try to figure out how to live with him.
There really was no way to do that. I tried them all.
PS- I don't want to hurt anyone here. Especially you Liz
Amy! Thank you for all your thought and caring you put into your posts. I know you, and everyone else here, want the best for my son and for me. You actually gave me something to think about because I was really feeling conflicted about some of the stuff in Al Anon and how things were panning out. I didn't see the connection until you brought it up that maybe Al Anon was hurting me because it was giving me an excuse to stay put and just put up with poor behavior and excuses, etc. I plan on meditating on this and journaling about it for the next week or so. Thank you.