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Old 08-06-2014, 10:11 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Woodman123
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 129
Yep- feel your pain Hockeyerik. Guilt is big... but so is denying yourself the happiness you (and all of us) deserve! Many say you shouldn't make any rash decisions early on in a separation. But, I think if you read alot of posts here, you'll see that many of us started just like you and every time you think "it couldn't get any worse, and maybe with a little more time and she/he will turn it around..." you'll find that it ALWAYS gets worse. Especially for the alcoholics that say, "I can do it myself", which IMO is most of them. Not to be cavalier, but my advice? RUN. You have 8 months of marriage invested. Yes, significant emotional attachments for sure, but you haven't built your life around this relationship, nor should you. I know that sounds harsh, and yes, some alcoholics do regain control of their lives (though I don't know of any), but this is an un-Godly, relentless and destructive disease, the power of which I've only begun to appreciate. I have 24 years of marriage to grieve whenever my AW signs the papers- nearly half a lifetime of pain and guilt for me- but like someone on this forum said once, "when the pain of staying exceeds the pain of leaving, you know it's time to go". I'm there now, and trust me, you'll get there eventually.

Take care of yourself. Best wishes to you.
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