I imagine the dynamic is a bit different when you're a man, and it's your wife who is the alcoholic. I know after I left my ex, I couldn't meet with him and talk with him about anything, because he still had such strong control over me. If I had met him and talked, he would have talked me into returning and trying again. I imagine -- and from what I've heard from other guys in your situation -- that for a man, it's less about control and more about guilt?
Either way -- do you feel comfortable that you can handle that talk with her without succumbing to her pleas to take you back? If not, do you have a pastor or other trusted friend who could sit in on the talk with you? A therapist?
You sound very strong and determined, but I know that emotions can play a trick on your mind. And I agree with Hopeful -- you do deserve to move on with your life.