Amy, I think you are dead on. Liz, it is long past time to keep allowing yourself to make your husband the center of your thinking. That is what you are doing now, again. It is only different in that now your center is that he isn't drinking. Before it was that he was drinking.
No matter what you call it, how you describe his momentary state of being, you are still dancing around the same old maypole: him.
That is not detachment, and it isn't recovery. It is just yet another way to avoid the core question: what do you want to do with YOUR life?
ShootingStar1