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You know I prayed to have the addiction removed. Make me not like the stuff or something. I prayed for a long time. It would be too easy to just remove an addiction I think in my case my higher power wanted to teach me a thing or too so that i'd remain sober. I also think my higher power has a sick sense of humor. So what did my higher power do? sent me panic attacks and horrible anxiety that was unbearable it just about forced me to quit in a last ditched effort to find some relief.

But i needed that. I needed the sobriety journey that came after. If i could have just been unable to afford the stuff or didnt like the stuff or wtvr else it woulda never worked. I think in my higher powers infinite wisdom he handled it just how it needed to be handled for me.

Sometimes you dont realize what is being done till you pushed through the situation etc..

I can relate to your first post too i had all the same thoughts go through my head.

My advice dont give up on your higher power because its doubtful your higher power has given up on you. In my case I needed to be refined in order to be free. I had to hit that breaking point those panic attacks did it for me that was enough for me. I thank my higher power for sending those god awful things because if not for that i'd still be drunk in a ditch for Sure. I cant tell you how many times i've said i'd drink if i new it woudlnt cause a panic attack!

Hang in there and keep coming here. its part of the journey to sobriety and the thing is we need the journey if we want to gain long term sobriety.

I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it go away for you. I wish someone could have done it for me too but I'm greatful for how was resolved for me i would not have it another way.