Welcome TheSouthern. Please know that you aren't alone, many of us have felt exactly like you do. Alcoholism does live inside us,but the good news is that so does the real you. And the real you can absolutely regain control.
What needs to happen is you have to change the way you have tried in the past - and try something much stronger, as well as recruit help from others. Have you considered trying a meeting based recovery method like AA/NA/Smart/etc? Being around others with the same problem can help immensely. Seek help from your doctor too - there are many programs like rehab ( inpatient and outpatient ) and counseling that can help too.
And don't forget us here on SR as a supplment - we have all been there, and many of us have turned it around.