Hi jsprplc2006,
When I was new to AA, I used to hear it shared quite a bit that there are some people who are just too smart to get sober. Back then I wasn't sure what they meant by that, but I kept coming because I had the gift of desperation.
Sounds to me as if you might be the classic text book definition of "too smart to get sober"
I will try to keep this real simple for you, because I too am of the Scientific world, in the Medical field, and before I went to AA and got involved, not just sitting there......I got involved, I too needed proof, to be shown exactly how this Program worked or I believed that if that couldn't be done to my satisfaction....then I am not going!!
Well, there came a day, that my brain, my degrees, books, psychologists, psychiatrists and all my intelligence.... was simply no good, didn't work, no matter what I did with this scientific mind..... I still picked up that next drink, because as one AA member put it to me....."I had no defense against the first drink"
Now, you and I when first faced with that simple truth, will fight it. After all, we are not powerless over anything! We are intelligent people!! LOL So intelligent that we will go to the GRAVE before asking for help and allow those who DO know how to stay sober, to help us. Now seriously, how intelligent is that? We are sometimes so EGO driven, that we will die, rather then simply just surrendering to the truth...... and that truth is, that there is a simple Solution that works, when we do not complicate the hell out of it.
That AA member back then told me the truth, that some people are just too smart to get sober, and that if I insisted on doing it my way, that no one here in the halls was going to trying to stop me. He suggested that I get to alot of AA meetings, sit up front and listen, get a Big Book and read it, get lots of telephone numbers, call them. Get a meeting list book and join an AA Group nearest to my home, get a Sponsor and begin working, applying and practicing the 12 Steps of AA...... because it works, when we work it.
Yup, I have been to many funerals of those who were just too damn smart to get sober in AA..... and I have also listened to some wonderful AA people without degrees, who have some of the most powerful recovery I have ever had seen. What an absolute honor to be with them and just listen to them share.
See, WE in AA, don't care where you come from or how you got here all we care about is that you get the same chance that WE did here in the halls of AA to recover from Alcoholism........whether you came in from Jail or Yale, We will welcome you with open arms.
See, alcoholism doesn't discriminate, it doesn't care if one is intelligent or not..... its an equal opportunity KILLER.
p.s. My son has a wonderful Scientific mind, he has a Bachelors in Physics, a Masters in Electrical Engineering, and he got them both at the same time... and he is working on his PhD in Computer Science at Johns Hopkins University. He was sent to Germany to work with some of the top Engineers in the World.
Guess what he is reading as we speak?
"Opening the Door of Your Heart" by Ajahn Brahm
And he loves it
