Hi, I am married almost 20 years to my college sweetheart. We were big time partiers in college. I continued the party on through my 20s and my 30s and he became a workaholic, but partied with me and our friends on the weekends. In our early 40s, we suffered a major financial blow and the drinking stopped being about "the party" and became scary. My husband realized it and pulled back without any effort. That is when I realized that I was the one with the real alcohol problem in our marriage. Sobriety has been a huge effort for me and luckily, in support of me, my husband quit drinking alcohol other than very occasionally having a beer at a work function. Still, I get frustrated that it is so easy for him to not drink, where it is something I have to work on every single day. I also feel annoyed that he doesn't acknowledge how hard it is for me, because it was so easy for him. Today is my 10 month anniversary of sobriety and I didn't even tell him because if he "over did" the congratulations that would annoy me, too. I guess that puts him between a rock and a hard place. :P We have always been best friends, but sobriety has been a weird ride, because I feel like my personality is changing on a weekly basis. I really was scared that I would wake up out of my "alcoholic fog" and not like where I was in my life and in my relationship. I sometimes do too much of making all arguments we have or anything I construe as controlling on his part as somehow related to my sobriety, when it really doesn't have anything to do with it. I felt more inhibited intimacy-wise, too, which was strange for both of us. So, yes, sobriety does add some complications to your marriage, but it also makes it more interesting and new and fresh, too. Like all things, time, no rash decisions and a positive perspective makes all of the difference. Good luck!!