jdooner

I never met the old you but you got glimpses of the old me when I first joined. Despite my **** and vinegar you extended your hand through this computer to me to provide comfort by relating. I am glad I never met the old Dee although, perhaps the contrast would make me appreciate the new Dee more...nah, still love you man!

Your comments about wealth reminded me of this George Carlin skit on stuff. I had to look outside myself for my self worth because I hated JD but could not come to admit it. As I would amass more stuff I would rationalize my worth by how much stuff I had. I would compare myself to someone less fortunate in terms of worldly goods and material possessions. You know that high school or college reunion and there is always that guy that needs to show off - rents the Ferrari - that is the insecure guy. That was me. What I lost though is how empty I was. This quest to get more stuff and buy more stuff to house my stuff became a hungry ghost, sucking the life out from my insides. It also kept me in active addiction far longer and the stuff I had allowed me to go deeper because I could bail out the boat and rationalize why I was not like other addicts and alcoholics.

Due to my social status and the life I created I am surrounded by very sick ,albeit wealthy people. It is a constant reminder of the emptiness found in anything we chase to find happiness whether cars, planes, boats, houses, clothes, jewels, even spouses (the term trophy wife come to mind). Eventually we need to buy more stuff to keep accumulating more stuff - it never ends, no matter who you are. Watch that show Shark Tank to see how sick some billionaires are.

Bill Gates and Warren Buffet and several other billionaires get this, which is why they are pledging to donate 80% of their net worth to charity. There may be other motives but at some point in our life if we are lucky, we are able to realize the futility of "keeping up with the Jones." It almost killed me and I am grateful to escape those shackles at 40.

Eckhart Tolle in his book writes about Enlightenment:
A beggar had been sitting by the side of a road for over thirty years. One day a stranger walked by. “Spare some change?” mumbled the beggar, mechanically holding out his old baseball cap. “I have nothing to give you,” said the stranger. Then he asked: “What’s that you are sitting on?” “Nothing,” replied the beggar. “Just an old box. I have been sitting on it for as long as I can remember.” “Ever looked inside?” asked the stranger. “No,” said the beggar. “What’s the point? There’s nothing in there.” “Have a look inside,” insisted the stranger. The beggar managed to pry open the lid. With astonishment, disbelief, and elation, he saw that the box was filled with gold.

I am that stranger who has nothing to give you and who is telling you to look inside. Not inside any box, as in the parable, but somewhere even closer: inside yourself.

Tolle, Eckhart (2010-10-06). The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment (Kindle Locations 407-414). New World Library. Kindle Edition.

For a good laugh: George Carlin - Stuff - YouTube