You are a grown woman, not a 12-year-old girl. You don't have to listen to your mom anymore. You have a right to tell her that you won't be talked to a certain way, or have certain subjects brought up. You are allowed to end a call if it bothers you.
That said, once I quit I realized that I tended to exaggerate the stress of certain situations as to give me a justified excuse for drinking. It was worse whenever I tried quitting, as my addiction knew my triggers.
So I ask you, who's triggering your drinking? Your mom? Or your addiction?