i had no one left in my life to get sober for they all left me for dead and rightly so
i had nothing left in my life to get sober for as i lost it all
in the end there was just me left, i just couldnt carry on anymore i hated myself, i hated how my life was no a mere nothing of an existence
the only thing left i had to lose was my life i wanted to die and prayed to die just to go to sleep and never wake up again would of been the best way out for me
i ended up at the doors of aa with nothing
i dont know how people can give up for anyone or anything but i only wish i could of done and saved a lot of pain for others but this was to be my path and i guess i am lucky as i lived.
like i have said i do know plenty of people who turn up at aa and they keep there familys and jobs and money they dont have to go down that route so if there giving up to save them from it all then yes they can give up for other reasons than themselves
but for me i had to lose it all before i could ever have a chance of getting things back again like my kids etc
i can not turn the clocks back and sometimes i wish i could of saved my kids going into care or all the other bad things that happend in my life but i can not do anything about the past. i can only make sure it never happends again by staying sober and changing who i am