Thanks everybody. In the 2 days I have gone no contact I feel like I am becoming me again. Honestly I don't miss her or the "relationship" we had together. I was miserable and felt like I really lost myself in it. I know that's on me and I don't want that to happen again. I am keeping a journal of my thoughts in feelings so I can look back and see if anything is changing in regards to that. I am loving being only responsible for me and right now I want it to stay that way. Future goals pop up in my head and none of them include her at this point. I know 2 days is a short time but this feels like my inner voice speaking to me very clearly. Time will tell of course. Thanks.