When I read the heading, "I did something really stupid, " I thought you were going to say you hit someone or slashed some tires or something. I can see how X might get himself worked up, like maybe he thought you were mocking him or trying to rub it in his face that he can't drink, but you can. If you're allowed to be triggered by him not working his program the way you want him to, then he could maybe be forgiven for being triggered by you drinking. I'm still with the camp that says it's his responsibility. It's his inference that he may or may not be making. He's bound to be crabby right now with giving up his coping mechanism, but that doesn't mean he has license to get passive aggressive with you or try to blame you for anything. We all get crabby and most of us probably act poorly when we do. However, we are responsible for reflection and amends. I agree that you guys might need some space. He probably needs space to be grumpy while adjusting to sobriety and you need space to get over being lied to about something so dire.