I don't see self empowerment, taking responsibility as an issue of Control ...
sam,
to me, that's a really important distinction you're making. and yes, i agree with your statement about inflicting violence as an extreme form of acknowledgment.
(just remembering the times my dad slapped me across the face when i was a teenager...i knew without a doubt that it was extreme acknowledgment. and that he felt powerless to do anything else but do this violent form of showing his "power".)
but Sparky's statement about our individual plans is so, of course.
my drinking life and countless returns to drinking showed me that co-existing with 'the voice' is the way to go. for me. it's not a problem. anything else is war inside me. that's how it used to be the gazillion times i tried to quit before. the "fighting stance" was a win/lose by definition for me. and since that was going on inside me, and not with an outside entity such as beets or spaghetti, it was invariably me who lost.