It's also true that statistically, more people attempting recovery return to drinking vs achieving long term sobriety. And that is regardless of what type of sobriety method they choose to use/not use.
Do relapses hurt us? Most likely yes. Are they selfish? Addiction is selfish by nature so it's kind of a redundant question.
Bottom line though, arguing about it and name-calling because of differences in philosophies won't help anyone. Keep in mind that this is the Newcomers forum as well.