Cathy31

What do you do when you make amends to someone and they are totally ungracious and start pointing out all the other bad things you did (even though are alcoholics too - not acknowledged - and have done terrible things to you that they have NEVER apologised for!?)

I made amends to my sister about something I had done when drunk (more like very hurtful things I said a few years ago)

Now, I need to preface this, I didn't do it as part of a step, I am sober a couple of months, and only just met a sponsor and only just starting step one. Maybe in there lies the issue!

So I didn't make amends as part of a step, but I felt real remorse for the first time about this particular incident, and wanted to apologise to my dad which I did and then thought about my sister and did same. (in writing they live on different continent)

Did I rush it? Reason I am asking is that she came back all UNGRACIOUS and MEAN SPIRITED and it's made me really cross, almost resentful. Should I have waited, so that I had an arsenal of tools to help me to rise above it?

I didn't reciprocate her nastiness or anything, but I feel almost distressed and resentful about it. She is a really awful selfish person and never takes responsibility for anything - so to throw this back in my face!?

Are there some stock phrases one could use as self talk - or even in response....ie I am sorry you feel that way but I can only apologise for my part...?

I am going to pray about it now but I hoped some of you might be able to shed some insight. This is new to me because everyone in mywhole life so far has been so supportive and wonderful. So for someone I find it hard to like anyway, to act like this is really difficult.

Thanks
Cathy31
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